I’m worth only what i give: forgiveness

I woke up to this message from my friend Candy, Saturday morning. She had received these words in an email that she got that morning. It really puts words to paper what i’ve been learning about Forgiveness.–

“Healing Our Memories:

Forgiving does not mean forgetting. When we forgive a person, the memory of the wound might stay with us for a long time, even throughout our lives. Sometimes we carry the memory in our bodies as a visible sign. But forgiveness changes the way we remember. It converts the curse into a blessing. When we forgive our parents for their divorce, our children for their lack of attention, our friends for their unfaithfulness in crisis, our doctors for their ill advice, we no longer have to experience ourselves as the victims of events we had no control over.

Forgiveness allows us to claim our own power and not let these events destroy us; it enables them to become events that deepen the wisdom of our hearts. Forgiveness indeed heals memories.”

I really needed that. Thank you, Candy.

Forgiveness is an interesting topic. A typical response to hearing the word is a wince and grimace. It’s a hard subject.– because we’re human, we aren’t always very good with forgiving people. Luckily, we have the best example of a Forgiver to look up to: God. We, as Americans, as humans, have an undeniable sense of justice instilled in us at an early age. When you do something wrong as a child, you’re punished. We’re rasied believing in correction and justice. It becomes a lot more serious when you grow out of the spankings and timeouts. Then, it’s imprisonment, the death penalty, flogging, beating, discrimination etc. You may look at that little list and say, not in America, not in MY town! But look around you, one isn’t any worse than the others in Jesus’ eyes.
But don’t get me wrong, God stands for justice. He sees when we’re wronged. You don’t have to worry about that. He has the ultimate say-so between Heaven and Hell. Oh yes, our God delights in justice.

But, He forgives, and even more than that, our God forgets. So how do we grasp these two extremes? Forgiveness vs. Justice.

First, I think we have to recognize that they really aren’t extreme opposites. I don’t believe that God delights in seeing a terrorist sent to hell. No, we don’t serve a man on a throne throwing down lightning bolts at our every sin. We serve a Just God, but we also serve a Compassionate God. We serve a Father who delights in hearing us ask for forgiveness and gladly tells us our sins are washed clean by the blood of His Son. I heard a song by Beckah Shae the other day for the first time(I’ve had it on my iPod for a LONG time)while I was praying about forgiving someone. Read the lyrics. They’re so true.

Forgiveness-

Betrayed and let down, they gossip and slander
They sabotage You as they mock You, it’s just a mess!
But I refuse to amuse the lies
And whether or not they apologize
I’m moving on, I’m going to let go cause I got to fly

Laying down all that’s in the past, no bitterness
Putting aside all my pain and my pride, to be blessed
I’ve learned what we hold against someone else
Will only wind up hurting ourselves
We need love motivation

Forgiveness, there’s healing in your wings
Your peace it lets me breathe
Forgiveness, You’re the reason why I live
I’m worth only what I give
Forgiveness

The damage is done, the scars still remain
But I gained wisdom and strength
So I declare the victory is won

I refuse to amuse the pain
Won’t let it take my freedom away
I’m moving on, I’m going to let go
Cause tomorrow’s a better day

Laying down all that’s in the past, no bitterness
Putting aside all my pain and my pride, to be blessed
I’ve learned what we hold against someone else
Will only wind up hurting ourselves
We need love motivation

Forgiveness, there’s healing in your wings
Your peace it lets me breathe
Forgiveness, You’re the reason why I live
I’m worth only what I give
Forgiveness

I am only human, I am so imperfect
And I’m whole heartedly
asking You to forgive me, oh
Forgive me, forgive me, forgive me

You got to take in the air and just breathe in
Believe in order to let a broken heart
start beat, beat beating’ again
A gain of restored grace
From a flash in a past space
What’s left is a bad taste

Repairing from despair
Which left you unaware
That others desperation of hating’
Which had you stating’ what was done in the past,
History, so ill, the sting from the blow, fast hit, it’s so real

Faced with the options presented
Forgive or resent it. to live or regret it, grip or forget it
You got to love or hate it
See, the truth’s been stated
Let it go, because the past has been dated

Now pardon me of my faults in the fall of me
Dignity placed in all we see
Drawn from a source of what we can’t force
A loving trace of a crimson course
Of course, no remorse in

Forgiveness, there’s healing in your wings
Your peace it lets me breathe
Forgiveness, You’re the reason why I live
I’m worth only what I give
Forgiveness

The reason why I live
I’m worth only what I give
Forgiveness

Wow. We’re worth only what we GIVE. We’re only worth what we forgive.

So we know that God forgives us. But what about forgiving others?
It’s hard. No one’s going to lie to you and tell you that it’s not. It’s painful. There’s so many things that can go wrong. So many “what ifs” But let me tell you, when you really do forgive someone, whole-heartedly, it feels like a ton of bricks have been lifted off your shoulders.– it also feels that way when you’re forgivEN! But right now I want to focus on the weight that literally falls off when you’re able to finally forgive someone in your heart. It’s a joy, so real. It’s really unexplainable. I experienced this joy, first hand about a month ago. I was twirling around crying and I felt like I weighed 5 lbs. I was FLYING around! I know it sounds funny, but I mean “a ton of bricks” in the most LITERAL sense in the world. God’s crazy-good! He wants us to forgive. He commands us to forgive.

Colossians 3:13 Be even-tempered, content with second place, quick to forgive an offense. Forgive as quickly and completely as the Master forgave you.

Lord, I thank you for being the ultimate example of forgiveness. I thank you for wanting a personal relationship with me and wanting to teach me about forgiveness. I thank you for making forgiving so FUN! I thank you for putting Joy in the midst of every situation. Thank you for the people who have forgiven me and thank you for the people who teach me how to forgive others. Thank you for always forgiving me, daily, because my sins are many. But your forgiveness is abundant. I praise you that by the blood of Your most precious Son, my slate is wiped clean.
Loves,
Carlee

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One thought on “I’m worth only what i give: forgiveness

  1. Carlee, maybe one day I can tell you how very timely this one was for me. Your words could have been directed totally to me, so apt were they. I know exactly what you mean about weighing less–in fact I even used those words as I described to my prayer sisters what happened when I recognized that God had enabled me to forgive a situation I had been holding in judgment for a long time. This was of course before I read your blog. Sometimes I think we share a wavelength. What???

    mimi

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